A note from Vicki:
Statics: I read that 42% of adults have at least one step-relative, with 30% having a step- or half- sibling. That is tells me there are a lot of step families out there.
Step families, are actually growing in numbers. Adults are not prepared for the complexity of the role and usually have very unrealistic expectations of how the family will look going forward.
In my work with step parents, there are a few tips I want to share with you for now.
Be clear about your role and what that means to you and your spouse.
Make realistic expectations. It takes 3 plus years for the family to make the transition.
Know where the child (ren) are developmentally – you need to learn about them, they don’t know how to be step children anymore than you do being a step parent.
Nurture your relationship with your spouse and learn how to communicate without defensiveness.
Be creative and breathe.